Tonight marks the end of a long online stream of conciousness which has kept me relatively sane during uni, and let me recite stories and thoughts which made me laugh, cry, and whinge about to avid blog readers... in which your viewing, thoughts, responses are mostly and scarily unknown to me...
But in all honestly, your reading (or since I don't really know - I just think you're reading...) has fuelled the novelty of writing so many opinionated posts, sometimes outrageous, sad or silly posts. :)
Eep. It's beginning to sound like goodbye... but it's not really... at all. I'm just going to try out a new space, a similar but different dimension of my life online. By my life, I mean Tim's also. :p
Anyways, so just a note really to say I'm going to move on~... to
www.tham.com.auThanks for reading specijen's blogspot and all the encouraging comments you've left!
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Photos!
Finally, I got my act together and started doing what a lot of people have already done...
Just started an online album to collect a whole heap of memories :)
www.jaraville.com.au
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Married to a geek...
So I got bored this afternoon and started 'catching up' on people's lives via the internet when I came across Queenie's blog and to my horror saw my very life vividly pass before my eyes.
Women who have bravely gone before me and fallen in love with a geek...
From dictionary.com, I found the definition of a geek. Fascinating where it originated...
–noun Slang.
1. a carnival performer who performs sensationally morbid or disgusting acts, as biting off the head of a live chicken.
2. a peculiar or offensive person, esp. one who is perceived to be overly intellectual.
3. an expert in computers (a term of pride as self-reference, but often considered offensive when used by outsiders.)
My husbund is of the third kind.
This is now the state of my home which is too freakishly close to what I read this afternoon:
1. I can check out files from my computer through a wireless game console on the TV!
2. There are little screws and nuts on my kitchen bench!
3. Each week, no less than 6 other geeks (yes, that's you richie, james, yang, justin and whaij (yes whaij - u too, your job description defines you as one)) come over, and laugh/snort over geeky jokes.
4. People who have visited mistaken tim's computer(without having looked at it) as a switched on hairdryer - last count it had 12 fans. Those who have seen the computer ask what happened to the case since there are now drives sitting outSIDE the box.
5. I've never had a computer problem.
6. My family have not had a prolonged computer problem.
7. My friends have not had a prolonged computer problem.
8. He's built a fully functional electronic drum kit and an entire music studio at home with a multiple track mixer thingomaggy, microphone amplifer-rerer, and amps which take up WAY too much room.
9. He cannot listen when he isn't doing something else like playing his PSP, or taking something apart.
10. He gets internet withdrawal symptoms when away for too long.
12. He gets internet withdrawal symptoms when he thinks he'll be away for too long.
13. We now have a car that has a laptop, a GPS, and a touch screen wired into it. He wanted to hook up the x-box too but i said NO.
14. I have too much video/camera gear to mention without feeling very sore at the hip pocket
15. I have way too many musical instruments to mention without feeling very sore at the hip pocket - none of which i can play.
16. For all the special dates which deserve a present, I have yet to receive something without a geek stamp. - mp3 player, electric violin, tv tuner card, digital camera, mobile phone, a new motherboard, a new monitor - and (this one tops it)for a sorry gift, he bought me a new network router...
and the list goes on.
Oh wells, for those who are marrying geeks, such as the future wives of the above mentioned guys - these will be some of the things you may enjoy.
They are adorable for all their idiosyncracies, and they have a bunch of loyal friends they see IRL and online, and they'll always make you look like you've actually thought about what you wear.
Signed,
Mrs TT
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Purpose of life
In a nutshell - To enjoy rest with God.
That was today's sermon. Genesis 1 - 2:3. Not the how of creation, but the why of us. The purpose is there - why God created us in the first place.
Thank you Lord.
Please don't let me forget that. Let me serve you for eternity.
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Every now and then... I hear something, see something, or just randomly feel a sense of overwhelmingly depressing dispair for life...
I guess it's no surprise seeing as sin festers in every single one of us. Its poisonous and infectious tentacles sting relationships, scar happiness, and ultimately lulls us into a false sense of independence and disregard for the reality of God's sovereignty.
Work has kept me from bible study several weeks in a row now - the scary thing is the longer I starve of God's word, the more I think I know and have enough... yet, I'm a christian living in a fallen world full of unbelievers and noble pursuits for perfection - and at odd moments, this strikes me on the head like a sharp rock.
It's frightening how often secular aspirations creep into my head. Watching others do what it takes. Observing the good. Observing and loathing the bad. Interacting with others using some facade that is so far from my core - am I myself? Why aren't I myself?
It's been a hard couple of weeks, and somewhere in between doing work, talking to people, and feeling like the bad guy at a client (I'm the IT SOX auditor - close to the most unpopular kind), I've been feeling the intense value differences of a Christian and the rest of the world.
So, all these frustrating little agonies flared in all directions, and until tonight, I didn't even know exactly what I felt like I was complaining about inside. Directed at no one in particular but as a generally frustration to anyone who isn't on God's side: Why are you so hardened? Why are you so ignorant to the fact that God has given us so many wonderful things to enjoy and do? How can you not want God's grace? How can you act like it doesn't concern you? Why do I have to sway to your principles on life when you completely disregard mine as though it's my own little world, when you are living and breathing only because He wills you to??
I think I have been trying to find some sort of balance between the Christian and secular life - although I was vehemently convinced that I wasn't - I think there is a bit too much acceptance on my part for me to justify to God that I still am trying to live his way. The reason why I think this is is because unknowingly, I've been trying very hard to appease and live like everyone else in appearance - my actions, even what I choose to laugh at - as though Christianity can be considered a sunday activity and doesn't saturate my entire being.
Anyways, i don't know if it's a real insightful click. But I think I'm going to stop trying to break from the spiritual track that God has set up along the straight and narrow. I shouldn't be feeling the push to get away from everything that I know is true. I should be feeling the push to get away from the vanity of hopelessness. If I'm not struggling against this world that is under the influence of the serpent - am i too complacent?
In the most unexpected ways - right in the middle of a client interview with a man who is thankfully a Christian - I heard the most fascinating statements in an audit - 'you know nobody is perfect, these controls aren't perfect, and people don't perform them perfectly, and i'm not perfect because i'm not Jesus'. It might not make much sense out of context the way I've put it - but at that point, it gave me so much perspective of now and eternity that I wanted to burst out laughing and praising God that perfection is in sight at his appointed time, and my job, as with any job, isn't going to achieve anything near perfection - so why should I dispair about being separated from an imperfect and hopeless world?
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I feel old
And to top it off, i stumble across this little quizz... and gah... i'm years ahead of myself! noooooooo...
I'll be yelling at kids to get off my lawn soon. (when i get a lawn).
Found this on Ness's blog. :)
Angelflower| You Are 30 Years Old |
Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe.
13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world.
20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences.
30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more!
40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax. |
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dum dee dum.
Every now and then I feel like wiping this blog clean and starting again...
oh wells. not today.
It's been a long long time since I've visited blog land.
Between boughts of sneezing, feeling guilty about all the mounting work in the office, and sandpapery coughs, I've been well enough to feel thoroughly bored.
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The other way to live...
Had a sudden blog urge today.
At work, caught in a massive pile of filing, (literally putting tabs between 8 documents for about 1000 pages), I had one of those stomach churning, goose bumpy thoughts - what if God hadn't saved me by His grace?
It was an ugly thought. Where would I be now? How might I behave? What awful person would I have become?
Too many were the days when I pretended God didn't exist and went on my hauntingly merry ways of life... without realising the full horror of my actions - spurning His Son, calling His name in vain, and never once marvelled at the works of His hands, and the Love of His character.
Then there's that ever dangerous walk to nowhere. Without purpose, without meaning, without ever fathoming the glory of heaven and genuine love. What did I think? Would I have ended up depressed?
It's performance review time. There has been a quiet mad rush in the office to fill our online forms to assess our performance on as many jobs we've done. I've spent about a week, inserting comments into boxes telling of my wonderful efficiency, and quality service skills... and there have been points in time when I have almost fooled myself into believing I have such capable hands that if I applied myself then I might be able to achieve anything and everything!
But there is not anything I can do except through God.
Not one thing at all that anyone can do without His sustaining power. And it bugs me that people are so ignorant to Him. But I was like that too. But then He changed me.
It doesn't ever cease to surprise me when people who've met me on this side of my life, make an effort never to swear in front of me, or believe I would understand a dirty joke.
So this little moment today seized me with a petrifying thought. How foul would my mouth be, how casual my relationships, and how much would I self promote?
And then I was filled with such thankfulness, and reverent fear that I had been so perilously close to the edge when God swiped me into His hands, brushed away the dirt, and provided me with the best example to live.
Now there is meaning, there is life, there is so much purpose, and joy. Thank you God!
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Bleh
It hasn't been particularly eventful of late...
The quietness at work is infecting my mood. My waking work hours are feeling groggy. Kinda like the effects of too much sleep.
Glad it's friday tomorrow though. I can't wait for the weekend - but like mondayitis, it flits by as well... and the week cycles through...
Anyways, I think I'm in too sombre a mood to not turn anything I write into some depressing, cynical, bored obversation of things. Am just glad that I'm at home, and have the luxury of choosing to sleep soon. :)
Goodnight~
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Ironing
There is something oddly satisfying watching wrinkles uncrease...
Such was 3 hours of my afternoon. Two basket loads of laundry we had carefully savoured up from laziness was finally cleared.
I'm absolutely amazed at how many many more items of Tim's there were to iron than mine. It's half due to the fact that when my clothing inventory went low, I did some ad-hoc morning work... while Tim happily wore twisted garments to work...
Anyways, right now, we're spending a typical afternoon in the study. We recently got two study tables side by side... He's got his monster machine on top of the table, with cables sprawling everywhere, 4 speakers and a sub, and two monitors... The computer box is currently lying on its side enduring another surgery of sorts... It's already got over a terrabyte of memory... and sounds like a hair dryer...
Meanwhile, in stark contrast, I've adopted a clean desk policy and going for the space look. I've got a pretty plush sewing box too - housing my cross stitches... and Rohan, the friendly tiger sitting on top guarding the box.
We're about to watch some Chinese gangster movie now... Infernal Affairs... cya
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